The river doesn’t like people and it tries to get away as fast as it can, really it hates everybody. It sees everything and just runs away; it gets pissy when rocks and sand build up and slow it down. It can’t stand seeing lovers sitting on its edge kissing because who wants to see that and quite frankly it would rather not have dogs jumping into its current to swim around for a stick or hunt a duck. It’s trying to get somewhere, wouldn’t you hate a big stone pillar cutting into your skin and sticking to your veins with moss and soda cups and fish eggs? Honestly people it’s got somewhere to go! Poor thing, sometimes it make s a wrong turn and gets trapped in a lake in which case I would definitely not want to be there when that happens. It remembers you too; if you’ve thrown something in there it will find you and flood your backyard. I wouldn’t be surprised if it scares the fish away from your worm as well so don’t even bother with that. Oh boy, waterfalls would take an hour to explain but then again they’re pretty self explanatory aren’t they? There was once this kid who would run away from home and sit on a bench in the distance and watch the water go by, he would sit there for hours and just think and watch it try to make its away. He grew up and moved down to the coast where it ended and they both shared a good laugh. Here’s a secret for the boats; just let it take you, just follow it, okay? Don’t try to push it around or throw up in it or completely block it from going anywhere. I know that’s nearly impossible considering the commercial demands of barges and stock boats these days but maybe you’ll think about it sometime? Maybe they all will when their road turn green and dries up and leads them into a murky swamp of forgotten rocks and eager rots waiting to be loved. Not to be a downer. Funny story, the river watches people of all shapes and sizes and knows all of their secrets and whispers and it knows more than your own grandparents so when it goes by all of the towns and villages and cities it tries to tell you everything it knows. That’s a lie, with certain cities it keeps that knowledge to itself but in some it’s willing to sneak up real shallow like to your toes and tell you a tale or two. I would tell you one myself but I’m on my way to the coast.